Giveaway...Hurry!!

You deserve a Christmas present. You do! I saw you on Santa's nice list the other night when we met up in the ghetoo! But, since Santa has much younger folks to concern himself with these days, he's not gonna just wrap up a little sumthin-sumthin for you without some effort on your part.

Don't get all worried. I know you have a lot to do. Presents to wrap, cookies to bake, and parties to plan...so this isn't going to be difficult. Just go here, leave a comment and if Santa picks you you'll get some goodies! If he doesn't, then keep reading and I promise you'll find something you can make for yourself that will fill the void. (And if you hate crafty things, then maybe you'll pick up some tips on how to never pay for toothpaste or toilet tissue again!) But hurry...I hear Santa has a spontaneous streak, and you never know when he'll click that button!

I hope everyone is having a lovely and peaceful Sunday afternoon. I know I am. An elf showed up and whispered in my ear. I can't tell you what he told me yet because it'll ruin the surprise, but stay tuned...because it's for you!

Alec the Highlander

This video was made by a friend of ours quite some time ago.
It depicts Turkey #2 as "Alec the Highlander" and Turkey #1 as "the Villain"........you can also hear Turkey #3 wailing in the background at one point. I believe she was only about 5 months old or so at the time, so she was most likely wailing for boobage. TMI? Sorry. My bad.
It's a great video and one that makes me laugh because it's so indicative of their true personalities. Watch, and see!

Also, please excuse the spelling of "coming" at the end, and understand that it was truly a typo on behalf of the guy who created the video. He's a bad A$$ soldier, and I'd trust him to protect my children in the line of fire....In a spelling bee ~ not so much.

Enjoy!


Alec the Highlander

A decade of friendship & Tums

This is Erin. Isn't she a cutie-patootie?





This is her son, Tyler. He's too much for words! Just smile, cause that's how he makes you feel.




Tyler & Beena Baby (aka Demon child, aka Turkey #3) are getting married. NO. Not now. We're going to let them wait until they're old enough to at least understand that their Mothers are forcing an arranged marriage on them simply to satisfy our need to actually be related after all these years.

Erin & Tyler were visiting from beautiful Rifle, Colorado. She and I have known each other since long before Tyler or Corrina were even considered. Long before either of us were ever married, long before 9/11, the War on Terrorism, Long before Britney was a SuperStar!!!

She's been my rock when I thought I had nothing left, and her soothing words have gotten me through many a moment that I simply couldn't see past, and I love her like a sister. At times, I feel really alone on my journey here...and she's one of the people I turn to when the solitude starts eating at my sanity. She get's me through it by reminding me how great my kids are, how much she loves each one of us, and how proud she is of me for standing up for what I believe in and taking this huge risk. When other people look at me like I'm crazy for leaving my gorgeous husband with a good job, secure benefits, and such a happy-go-lucky outlook on life...Erin reminds me that the happy-go-lucky included days where the children and I ate nothing but MRE's because he'd spent another paycheck at a ski resort and partied his woes away.
She doesn't let me feel sorry for myself, but reminds me that I made the right decision for us.

Without people like Erin, and my Jen-nay...and my Mommy, I'd have given up. I would have crawled under my bed with a bottle of Jagermeister and allowed my husband to run us so far into a financial hole that we'd never see the light again. Erin is my "responsible angel"
When I told her that my utility bill was $420 she immediately started crunching numbers and looking online to find out why. And how we could get it down. Not me. WE. (I keep my thermostat down...My bill is actually one of the lowest that I've heard of around here. It's scary)
Letters to governors, calling the power company....that girl was on it. And, she was on vacation.
See, I was just going to pay the sucker and call it even. Not Erin. No way. Hu-uh!

We also spent hours in the kitchen cooking, taste testing, throwing calories out the window willy nilly! It was wonderful and great and fattening and perfection. I think we used 2 entire bags of sugar and over 3/4's of a large bag of flower. 2 dozen eggs, and we cleaned out the fruits & veggies at the Farmers Market. Then we ate it. All of it. Then we ate some Zantac. Then we slept in the same bed and told ghost stories by candlelight and giggled until the sun came up.
If you haven't had a sleepover with a best friend in a while, I highly recommend it! There's no better therapy!




I love you Erin! You are the bomb dot com. And, I am not Lame dot net.

My Jen-nay

Happy Birthday lady! I wish we were celebrating together and not trapped in separate states. I want you to know I'm thinking of you, even though I can't be there for you.
You are an awesome woman, a rockin' Mama, and an amazing BFF. I love you, and I'm always here for you.

Two Wheels Move the Soul & Hurt my Bum

I'm getting tricked into a 3 hour motorcycle ride tomorrow. Could be fun. A good friend of mine has been using my garage for the past week to restore a wrecked Ducati Monster 7-something, I don't really know.
Now, I'm all up for an hour or so on the back of a bike cruising down the open road with mountains and rivers surrounding you in their nurturing cocoon. But....but...but....

It's HOT. And, HUMID. And did I mention DF-Dub? Um. Traffic out the wazoo. Semi-Trucks & Corvettes doing 120 are NOT my idea of a nurturing cocoonish type experience. I want to hear the sound of the Ducati revving up when it cruises up a mammoth hill. I do not want to hear 46 different radio stations blasting through the air at ear breaking decibels.
I want to rest my chest on the back of a guy I've known and trusted for longer than I can remember. I do not want to be looking around in fear at the thousands of vehicles rushing along beside me, around me, through me, and gripping said friends thighs while I battle a panic attack of epic proportions and my life flashes through my mind, and I pray that my babies will forgive me for being selfish enough to take an afternoon off.

So. Ya. I'm gonna go. Why? Because this friend saved me. Pulled me up when I was drowning and didn't even see the water rushing over my face. He found a beautiful house for my children and I (that I'm not starving to afford), gave me work through his company where I can keep my baby with me at all times, and smacks me around when I start whining that it's all too much. Dude keeps things in perspective. Dude would have a heart attack if he knew I called him "Dude"!

So, if he wants me to ride a Monster till my bum falls off. I will.

And, dammit. I'll like it.

Get your mind out of the gutter. A Ducati Monster. Motorcycle. You Dirty Bird.

Love & Sloppy Kisses

Pitiful Conversations

It's so sad what children do to their Mother's social life. We go from being care-free and clickin' our heels...to dragging 90 pound diaper bags around our necks like a noose. OK, maybe not quite that dramatic...but take this conversation I had with a dear friend the other day;

*Ring* *Ring* *Ring*

Me: "Hello"?

Dear Friend: "Hey! Haven't heard from you in a while, just wanted to check in!"

Me: "Oh! Hey Lady, what's crackilackin?" (Yep..I really said that)

DF: "Oh not much...just getting kids ready for school..you know how that goes. How 'bout you?"

Me: "Just about the sa...."

DF: "Wait, hang on one sec, "GRAYSON, I SAID, IS YOUR ROOM CLEAN???"....Sorry about that, oh wait, No, Grayson...not those paper towells, those are Daddy's garage towells. Use these. OK. Sorry again. Go ahead."

Me: "Oh well, I was just saying things are..."

DF; "hang on...hang on. Sorry. Kimberly? Kimberly? Is that you? Kimberly? Kimberly?hang on one sec"

Me: "Um, ok."

*phone muffles...barely*

DF: "KIMBERLY JANE. GET in HERE! Do you not hear me calling you? Kimberly? Kimberly? KIMBERLY??!!?!?!??!"
"Oh my goodness....TEENAGERS!...now what were you saying?"

Me: "Oh, I don't really remember. Nothing important. Um, do you wanna call me back when you aren't..."

DF: "Oh, Kimberly...sorry, one sec...Kimberly, I need you to get the checkbook out of the top drawer of my desk in the computer room....Ok...go ahead"

Me: Do you want to call me back when you....

DF "NO KIMBERLY! THE TOP DRAWER. No, No, Not that one. No, the other one. No. Kimberly, Look. In. The. Top. Drawer."

Me: Why don't you call me back?

DF: "OK, it was great catching up with you!"

Me: "um. ok. sure."

DF: "Grayson, no, not like that. This one. Wash like......CLICK"




P.S. Names were changed to protect the obnoxious.