Friday, November 21, 2008

Home Alarm System

If I had to pick my least favorite part of being a single Mom it would have to be the nights. They are looooong, and dark. They are creepy in way's you can only imagine, and I assure imagination runs rampant. I start jumping whenever one of the animals walks across the wood floor, the sound of a car door is a sign that someone is coming to mutilate my family and leave our bodies to be discovered by the oldest Turkey's friends. The ringing phone is a prank caller who's actually standing outside my window laughing at the stench of my fear.

It's really pathetic. I truly have nothing to be afraid of. Vigilant, yes ~ always. But, to be outright afraid is another thing entirely. I'm a smart woman. I pay attention, and should know better than to vibrate with fear each night. Our house sits on the corner and is 'faced' with another home, or a church on every side. Most would be break-in artists prefer to avoid such obvious targets. I'm also the proud owner of two dogs. Much like weapons, each has his own important purpose.

This is Simon. He is a miniature dobie. Most people know them as min-pins. Simon is the only animal I have ever bought myself. The little buggers truly believe they are the size of an adult dobie, and could rip anyone or anything to shreds. His bark is worse than his bite though, and in 7 years he's never bitten a human. Dogs...well, they should just stay away unless they want to be jumped into his gang.

Simon is my alarm. You can't sneeze in this neighborhood without a growl outta him. And, Lord help you if you park in my driveway...this freak will go nuts. He's an old man now, and has no patience for much of anything anymore. Simon prefers sleeping in my sons bed until noon or 1 o'clock..when I finally go in and roust his out for fear that he'll forget that he's potty trained. Can dogs get Alzheimer's?

This is Juju. Juju is my heart protector. It's a well kept secret (before today) that Juju is worthless. People look at him, and they're immediately scared, so he serves his purpose. But, frankly...he couldn't protect a fly from a from a tape roll. Or wouldn't, I guess would be the better word. His only weapon is his vicious tail that'll leave bruises on your thigh, and his wiggle that'll bowl over even the strongest of men. He's a big freakin' baby who just wants to be around, on, touching you at all times.

I do realize he's a pitt bull. I'm sorry if anyone reading this is offended by the breed. I want to add that before I met Juju, I was the same way. I've done exhaustive research regarding Pitt Bulls, and I am satisfied with what I've learned. I believe that with proper care, and proper vet care we'll have no problems.
As it stands...Juju doesn't know he's a breed of any kind. No clue. He's pretty sure he's my 4th child who just happens to have 4 legs. If he ever figures out the truth, I'm sure Simon will put him back in his place. And really damn quick too.


Anonymous said...

Your dogs are so cute! But with noises and looks like those, I'm sure they will scare away anything! Rest assured.

ChiTown Girl said...

That's the same alarm company I have! But, I'm not nearly as vigilant as you are. Or is that chicken? ;-) I don't even lock my doors. I know, crazy, but you can't even get near my house without my dog going ape shit! Night time noises have never bothered me, not even as a child. I'm not sure why, but I prefer to think it's because my parents gave me the idyllic childhood, where I always felt safe and secure. I actually prefer an empty house, even did when I was a kid. I think another contributing factor to my "fearlessness" is that my mom and sister are two of the BIGGEST scaredy cats ever on the planet. So, when they would freak out about a noise, my dad would explain to them exactly what it was (the chimney flap blowing in the wind, the furnace kicking on, whatever) so I eventually started trying to figure out the sounds for myself. I always knew there was a logical explaination for each one, and even now, I usually don't stop til I figure it out. Eventually, you get used to the noises of your house, then you don't even notice them.

BTW, I love pit bulls. They are the most misunderstood and misrepresented breed. They only act the way they are raised and trained to act. It makes me sad that they get such a bad rap. One of my friends has a pit bull, along with 7 kids!! This dog deserves a medal for putting up with all those kids! They sit on him, take food out of his mouth, try to ride him like a horse, you name it. He's the sweetest, most gently creature I've ever seen. I'm glad your Juju is, too! Simon is a cutie, as well. I've been dying to buy my parents a min-pin for years. They're just so expensive. I need to look into adopting/rescuing one.

Hey, have a great weekend!!

Washington Cowgirl said...

You'd be surprised how a seemingly easy going dog can take care of it's family. I don't think Juju will have to prove himself though, that dog is scary looking.